Talk:The CRISPR Immune System in Bacteria and Archaea: Difference between revisions
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Cas9 and Genetic Engineering- can you make this into paragraphs? It is a bit daunting at first since it is one large paragraph. Also, is that 3rd figure supposed to be in this section? It seems to close to the conclusion section. | Cas9 and Genetic Engineering- can you make this into paragraphs? It is a bit daunting at first since it is one large paragraph. Also, is that 3rd figure supposed to be in this section? It seems to close to the conclusion section. | ||
--Katie | --Katie Adlam | ||
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Revision as of 20:34, 3 May 2013
General Comments: First off, your writing was very easy to follow and in my opinion fits the style of wiki pages. This is obvious a topic of interest and a lot of studies are going on (especially since you were able to find studies from this year!) First off, I would get rid of the title/link "by Hunter Gervelis". Also, make sure you label your figures with a citation link. For the 1st figure, I would move it and make it more included in the structure section. What section does figure 2 belong to? Maybe explain it somewhere in your text. Also, you can use more figures if you want, especially when you are discussing research. It is nice to have diagrams/data. Don't forget to cite your sources within the text! It let's the reader know where you got your info from. It is overall a good account, I would just work on your formatting to make all the pictures line up to the sections and put in some paragraphs in the genetic engineering section.
Sections: Intro- Very well written and you did a good job setting up what's to come in the page.
Structure- In the 2nd sentence, I would either get rid of the parenthetical explanation of the palindromic sequence or included it in the sentence. It's a bit long to keep in parentheses. Also, watch for redundancy. You say "may correspond" in back to back sentences.
Operation- I would maybe make the four steps stick out by either making bullet points with numbers or something. It would help highlight what is involved in each step. Also, are there any diagrams of this that you could use as a figure?
Antiviral defense- again are there are pictures for this? Sometimes it helps for the reader to have a visual image.
CMR Targets Phage RNA- once again, try to avoid adding information in parenthesis. Either don't use it or add it to the sentence.
Antibiotic Resistance- when you introduce a species, try to use the full name (S. epidermidis and S. aureus)
Cas9 and Genetic Engineering- can you make this into paragraphs? It is a bit daunting at first since it is one large paragraph. Also, is that 3rd figure supposed to be in this section? It seems to close to the conclusion section.
--Katie Adlam
